He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
