he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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