Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize