it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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