God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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