Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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