i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
