I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
