I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
