I don't think brook has ever known best
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
