so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Please don't give away my fajitas
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
