You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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