I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
