come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
