I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Randomize