I want to have your abortion
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
