She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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