He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
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