It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I should be sponsored by Trojan
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
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