Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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