I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
is it fun? or sober?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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