who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize
