actually, I'm a sock model
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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