You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
