I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
