im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
