it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize