Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize