I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Never underestimate the power of titties
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
