I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
