Who wears a wallet chain?!
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
