Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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