I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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