Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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