Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize