The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
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