This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
