My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
