I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
