Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize