He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize