This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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