it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
