Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
