The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
is that a dick in a sweater?
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Randomize
