We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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