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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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