where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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