people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Houston, we have a squirter
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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