I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
