you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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