census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
